Kiwiᴵᶜʸ🥝🐿 semi ia

Kiwiᴵᶜʸ🥝🐿 semi ia

19-09-2022

00:50

Angst,sick fic,hurt/comfort Jxxng and Hwx always fought, that alone should have raised doubts in his mind when Hwx changed his demeanour one day to another, but his stupid crush didn't let him see more than the sweet words the older offered. It was almost hopeful, because his

shity life just made him crave love and to at least have been loved once before leaving this world. He wasn't sure where his sickness would take him to, but if he was sure of one thing it was that he was tired both physically and mentally and that he couldn't take it anymore.

But when he thought that life would have mercy on him when his results were favourable, he had a caring boyfriend that let their rivalry aside, and his parents finally understood each other; his little bubble of happiness popped crushing him, leaving him devastated.

Firstly his situation worsened that he almost had to be at the hospital every day, the doctors didn't know what was going wrong. Secondly his parents started to blame the other of not being able to realise what was happening before and hence their relationship just broke.

Thirdly not only his parents suffered a heartbreaking break up, him and Hwx were going through something similar but for Jxxng it was the breaking point of everything. He eavesdropped accidentally a conversation between Hwx and his friends and listened the words that just made

his eyes to prickle with tears and tear his heart apart. "He is sick, how can I even fight with someone in his condition? Probably he won't even be able to wake up the next month so I'm doing him a favour by leaving our stupid rivalry apart when we all know I fucking won".

For Hwx, he was a case of charity, his feelings were one-sided and probably laughed at. He was dumb enough to think that Hwx would feel something for him so quickly, he probably just felt sorry and tried to feel better with himself. So he just sent him a message in which

he broke up with him, without confronting the situation. He left Hwx the same way Hwx got involved in their love life, in the blink of an eye. It hurt, but he was a coward that didn't know how to bring it up, and he wasn't able to see Hwx everyday after that without

crying for himself. Maybe he was weak, but at least on the nights he had to spend on the cold hospital room, he could watch the little videos he had with Hwx. They were laughing, playing, studying, kissing, making new memories... It hurt sometimes remember that Hwx was faking

it all, but at least he had the small romance he always dreamed about. It wasn't like Hwx never tried to contact him those cold nights after the abrupt break up, but Jxxng decided that it was better leave without Hwx getting too attached to him. If only he knew...

It was a cold day when Jxxng's parents contacted Hwx, telling him really worriedly that Jxxng was in a really bad situation, some of his organs were failing and maybe he wanted to talk to him before anything /bad/ happened. Hwx didn't even know how he did arrive to the hospital.

But since Jxxng disappeared he couldn't help but feel sick, it was so sudden that his brain always came up with the worst. And what the younger's parents said was only confirming it to him. He leaned his head against the wall, sitting on that so familiar hospital chair.

Jxxng's parents went to the cafeteria to drink some coffee and he was left alone waiting for having his turn to visit Jxxng. Now he was stable, but slightly on the delicate side of it. He felt the tears in the brim of his eyes. What would he do if he lost Jxxng?

He was everything he knew since little, and was an essential part of his life, even if the biggest part of it had involved them bickering and being at each other's throats. If he lost Jxxng he would be empty, and now even more after tasting the sweetness of being together.

He whipped a little tear when he heard a nurse calling his name and almost automatically he got up, walking to be by her side. "You can see, Hxngjxxng, but please you need to wear a mask and use alcohol to disinfect yourself." He nodded and did so, to then enter the room.

Jxxng was laying on his back looking at the ceiling, deep in thought. "Jxxngie?" Hwx muttered feeling his heart clench at the sight of Jxxng being surrounded of all of those machines. "Hmmm?" The other muttered. "How do you feel?" Hwx asked as if it wasn't obvious.

"I'm still alive, so I guess I'm fine." Jxxng looked at him with a small smile, his eyes swollen from all the crying. Hwx breathed in trying to keep his tears at bay, the sight was heartbreaking. "I missed you so bad..." Jxxng said trying to reach Hwx's hand. "Me too..."

"Lies," Hwx looked at him confused while held the other's hand. "You were sorry for me, Hwx... I heard you." "Sorry?" He muttered confused. "Hmmm..." Hwx sat besides Jxxng while holding his hand even more confused. "How? When? What?" Jxxng looked at the ceiling again.

The silence made Hwx feel uneasy, he never said he felt sorry for Jxxng's situation, did he? "You were talking to your friends, and you said I probably wouldn't make it the next month so it was clear you won in our rivalry" Jxxng said after the long pause. "It hurt more than

I wanted it to..." Jxxng closed his eyes trying to not cry. "What?" Hwx muttered trying to recall the moment in which he said such words. "Jxxng I never was with you because I feel sorry, I genuinely care and like you, even I can say I love you, but they were asking me to ditch

you because of the stupid rivalry and I was really upset that people thought they had the right to opine in mattersthat they know anything about. Those weren't my best choice of words but I promise you that I never saw you as someone I should feel sorry for."

Jxxng hiccuped trying to keep at bay his tears. "Please, Hwx don't lie to me, I don't think my heart is able to process it." "I'm really sorry, Jxxng, I'm sorry for hurting you, I'm sorry for what I've said, I'm sorry for having lost time with you for my choice of words..." He

carded his fingers on Jxxng's hair. "I'm sorry for not insisting even more to take care of you and your heart in this situation," a little tear fell down his face. "I thought the worst when you broke up with me, Jxxng..." Both cried in silence for a while until Jxxng tugged

Hwx's hand and patted the bed making room for him. Without words, Hwx climbed hesitantly Jxxng's bed and hugged him close to his body, tugging Jxxng's head under his chin. "I'm sorry, love." Hwx muttered. "You're stronger that you should feel sorry for dating someone like me..."

That alone made Jxxng let a strangled laugh. "What if I die?" He voiced his concern. "You won't, I would give each part of me if that means you keep being alive and making your dreams come true, you deserve to live." "I want to kiss you so bad." Jxxng groaned. "Soon, love."

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