ɖʀʊӄքǟ ӄʊռʟɛʏ 🇧🇹🇹🇩

ɖʀʊӄքǟ ӄʊռʟɛʏ 🇧🇹🇹🇩

23-11-2022

14:54

WHO ARE THE LEADING PERSONALITIES ON THE ONLINE RIGHT?: A PRIMER With the influence of the Online Right continuing to spread, there has never been a better time to get involved with the popular, emerging ‘scene’. But which personalities made the Online Right what it is today? 🧵

WATA’UI THE POLYNESIAN SHAMAN Much-loved poster and a cult favourite, Wata’ui is known for his witty and learned tweets on obscure styles of ethnic pottery. Wata’ui coined the iconic and oft-repeated alt-right phrases “let’s get racist”, “it’s racism time” and “racism: activate”

CAPTAIN FUCKFACE Known Women Expert, Captain Fuckface regularly draws the ire of smaller accounts for his brash, unapologetic posting of Scat Porn. Often posting pictures of women smeared in shit, he signs off his tweets with his catchphrase; “I am going to fuck her in the face”

WART Infamous theorycel and misanthrope Wart shot to internet fame for a 2016 viral video where he accidentally did a shit in his pants onstage during a public reading of Hegel’s ‘Phenomenology of Spirit’ to celebrate Trump’s election, while letting out a whimpering orgasm noise

SPREADSHEET BOY A genetics expert, Spreadsheet Boy insists on mapping his experiences both in his own reading and on Twitter on spreadsheets. He often becomes irritated if users reply to his tweets in a way that isn’t easy to format onto Excel; “That isn’t very spreadsheetable”

NIGERSAURUS The biggest account on Racist Dinosaur PFP Twitter, Nigersaurus has a large following as one of the E-Right’s Top Reply Guys - replying to tweets with explicit slurs like the N-Word as well as typed Dinosaur noises eg ‘RAAWWRR’ and attached pictures/gifs of dinosaurs

WALKABLE CITY TECHNOCRAT Always ready with a graph like a good Technocrat, he refuses to tweet not including graphs. He zips into replies with trademark wit and aplomb eg; “hehehaw here’s a graph for yaa!”, “waahaha have a sniff of this data” or “numbers bucko, read em and sulk”

THE DOT The enigmatic ‘Dot’ tweets entirely in cryptic, coded messages, writing in obscure mathematical languages and making arcane James Joyce-like literary references. There was a minor scandal when his tweets were deciphered and it was revealed he had plagiarised most of them

GROGGLE A cult figure amongst the very online Racist Geocache Community and famous for his acerbic, caustic wit and showmanship, Groggle has been banned 34 times this year. Groggle is famous for beginning all of his tweets with his trademark phrase: “Groggle Dee Groggle Doo-”

FERNANDO THE DWARF Gregarious Fernando is the E-Right’s leading streamer. If there is a stream airing anywhere Fernando will be on it. Recently, Fernando has taken to frequently replying “ye stole me lucky gold” in reply sections for some reason despite being told it isn’t funny

INFORMATION AGE PEDOPHILE The knowledgeable ‘Peady’ frequently posts insightful threads on anthropology and archeology. Inexplicably he does so in character as a man whose brain was uploaded to the Internet in 1995 who ‘developed pedophilia from the information overload and Y2K’

FAHRUDIN THE BOSNIAN Mexico-born Fahrudin ran the legendary Gay Retard Forum, where many of the Right’s iconic Accounts began their posting careers. Fahrudin insisted every post had to rhyme, which is why even now most users tweet in rhyme. Today, he sells handwoven rugs on Etsy

ZIPPY One of the most iconic and beloved founding members of the Gay Retard Forum. With her sassy, go-getting attitude and bubbly, funky fresh personality, Zippy is always quick with an epic quip or a cheeky clap-back eg “awww hell nah”, “you got zipped” or “puuuhhlease hermano”

MUSHROOM LAD Thanks to Mushroom Lad’s Mushroom Nationalism Mushroomania swept Twitter, with thousands of users sharing Fungi-gobbling tips. Mushroom Lad recently went mainstream, starring in a Tucker Documentary in which he foraged for Mushrooms with Tucker in an enchanted cave

MR. EXIT Alarmed at SOCIETY, Exit offers popular advice: You need to fucking leave. Start running, just fucking run. You need to live in tents, under bridges, in trees. Move constantly. You’re not serious if you’re not hovel-maxing. You need to a smear yourself in dirt, eat rats

CHEROKEE JOE King of Haunted Twitter, a community for creating Spook-tacular Choose Your Own Adventure Tales, where users create their own ghoulish E-experiences sure to send shivers down their spines by choosing among goosebumps-raising reply chains in Joe’s frightful threads

JUNGLE RAT The legendary Jungle Rat pioneered the UltraChad 9000 Mega UltraMax memes, near single-handedly creating a whole new genre of posting. When users spot a totally epic tweet many reply with his iconic phrase “You forgot to attach the UltraChad 9000 Mega UltraMax image”

J.B. RANDALL Intellectual and champion of obscure C19th Ruritanian thinker Karl Janos Ludwig Van de Von György Hönigswald. Randall believes Karl Janos Ludwig Van de Von György Hönigswald’s philosophy, alongside the notion of X-Power, fully explains Elite Theory 2: Eliter Theory

4 ZALLAN ZPOE Acclaimed writer known for composing gothic poetry in morse code. He recently became obsessed with the idea of hypermaxing and often comments on the need for the right to “learn how to hypermax,” “start hypermaxing or lose” and “hypermax to win easily this decade”



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